‘I question the fairness’: My dad and mom wish to repay my $200,000 mortgage, and transfer into my rental. They say I’ll owe my sister $100,000. Is this dangerous?

Recently, my dad and mom offered their apartment to satisfy their long-standing want to dwell in my downtown apartment, providing them better comfort for purchasing, socializing with associates, and fostering a stronger connection to the group.

My dad and mom suggest to make use of the proceeds from their apartment sale to repay my mortgage, an quantity that exactly matches the excellent stability. The problem arises as I nonetheless carry a mortgage on my apartment, initially desiring to lease it out to cowl the month-to-month funds. 

Complicating issues, my older sister is entitled to 50% of the cash from our dad and mom’ apartment sale, on condition that there are solely two kids within the household. If they clear my mortgage, how do I decide my sister’s future declare on my apartment? 

Assuming the apartment sale fetches $400,000, with $200,000 allotted to settle my mortgage, my dad and mom assert that, upon their passing, I have to return this quantity to my sister. However, I’m wondering if it’s really that easy, contemplating the potential inflation of this worth over time.

Alternatively, splitting the $400,000 evenly now would allocate $200,000 to my sister and the remaining $200,000 to me. Yet, this falls wanting masking my present mortgage, requiring my dad and mom to cowl the stability. I query the equity of this, particularly asking them to deal with the month-to-month mortgage.

I search your recommendation on this matter. Thank you.

The Other Sister

Also see: My sister and her ex-husband promised, of their divorce decree, to repay my mortgage. They by no means did. Is this legally binding?

“I see what’s in it for your parents and, to a lesser extent, for you: They get to live somewhere rent-free for the rest of their lives, and you get $200,000 upfront.”


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Dear Sister,

This is way extra sophisticated than it must be. 

Your dad and mom can not afford to repay your mortgage if they are saying they’ve to provide 50% of that $200,000 to your sister as their inheritance. It places you in a tough place: You are then beholden to your sister to provide her $100,000, a debt I assume you’ll honor, however this column is filled with such preparations the place agreements had been made (however not signed) and other people reneged on them after their dad and mom handed away.

Another issue: If they repay your mortgage, and your apartment will increase in worth by 50% over the following 10 years — or extra years, within the hope that your dad and mom have a wholesome and lengthy life — do you repay your sister $150,000 or $100,000? Your sister wouldn’t be an investor in your apartment, so giving her the $100,000 she would have acquired initially would appear like an affordable answer.

I see what’s in it in your dad and mom and, to a lesser extent, for you: They get to dwell someplace rent-free, and also you get $200,000 upfront. But they’re actually solely supplying you with $100,000 and, for those who did go forward with this, your dad and mom can be successfully loaning you the opposite $100,000. Ask them to maintain the proceeds from their apartment, as they might require it for emergencies, and lease a apartment in an space of their selecting.

But what if there was a property crash and the apartment, now value $400,000, is value $200,000 at some date sooner or later? What if there was flood injury and also you didn’t have satisfactory insurance coverage? And what in case your sister cries foul, and says she needs the cash tomorrow? What in case your dad and mom develop into frail as they age and wish to maneuver to residential care, and their cash is wrapped up in your apartment?

If your dad and mom did repay your mortgage, and lived one other 20 years, they might be residing in a $400,000 apartment at a value of $200,000 to them, and you’ll obtain no rental revenue over that point. When you lease a home, you can too avail of many tax write-offs, together with depreciation, promoting bills and upkeep and repairs. You received’t have the ability to declare these, in case your dad and mom reside there rent-free.

Seek authorized counsel

It bears repeating: Never make such a giant monetary choice with out the assistance of authorized counsel, particularly if you’re coping with relations. Gary Botwinick, chair of the wills, trusts & estates, and taxation apply teams at Einhorn Barbarito in Denville, N.J., has sympathy for you — and your dad and mom. “The matter of equalizing children in an estate plan is one of the most challenging issues for a parent, especially where one child has current needs and one or more of the others does not,” he says.

He suggests your dad and mom may pay down half of your mortgage and provides your sister her share of the inheritance now. Second, they might give every of you a money present, and you might every select to spend it as you would like. Third, Botwinick says your dad and mom may pay down your mortgage and buy an curiosity in your residence, if that they had the cash, and go away that curiosity in your residence to your sister on the demise of the survivor of the 2 of you. (That sounds just like the least enticing choice to me.)

Families — or household methods, as they’re typically known as by psychologists — have a fancy set of values and expectations that individuals might or will not be conscious of. People are conditioned to simply accept sure issues and behave in a sure approach in households, and in the event that they deviate, typically different relations are inspired to intervene. Do not really feel obligation sure to simply accept this association.

If you do resolve to say no their supply, and lease to your dad and mom (as a substitute of an impartial third occasion), ask them to signal a rental settlement. It’s good apply. There shall be no dispute about who was alleged to pay for what. But would you be prepared to extend the lease in your dad and mom if property taxes rose and the rental market improved? For all the above causes, it’s higher to keep away from mixing household and finance.

Maintain your monetary independence, and assist your dad and mom discover one other property.

More from Quentin Fottrell:

‘My father, 75, died without a will’: His ex-wife, fiancée and kids are hiding his monetary paperwork. What can I do?

I would like extra time with my new child son, however my husband doesn’t work. Should I quit my job and dip into my six-figure belief fund?

My husband purchased our home with an inheritance. I signed a quitclaim. He mentioned I may dwell there after he dies, however modified his thoughts. What now?

You can electronic mail The Moneyist with any monetary and moral questions at qfottrell@marketwatch.com, and comply with Quentin Fottrell on X, the platform previously generally known as Twitter. The Moneyist regrets he can not reply to questions individually.

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