Our older son, 37, is an artist and places $1,000 a month on our bank card. Our different son, 35, is self-sufficient. Is that unfair?

We’ve been contributing to a Roth IRA for every of them once we can. Our older son wants more money for now, and our different son prides himself on adulting. But typically I ponder if we should always attempt to be extra evenhanded.

Maybe I’m overthinking this. I’m grateful we’re able to assist. Your ideas?

Patron of the Arts

Dear Patron,

Hopefully, your patronage will repay. You’re grateful to be able to assist, and your older son is lucky to be on the receiving finish. It could also be that this provides him the time and house he must create the sort of artwork he desires, to search out an agent or a gallery and to kickstart his profession. You have given him the posh of time to pursue his goals. 

But you might also want to revisit his progress at common intervals. How lengthy do you consider that is sustainable? Three years? Five years? Ten years? Every 12 months he spends utilizing your bank card and dealing on his artwork is a 12 months that would yield dividends on your son and his inventive profession, nevertheless it’s additionally one other 12 months during which he has not achieved monetary independence.

If your son was 27 quite than 37, I is perhaps much less involved about his long-term future. You can achieve this a lot to assist him now, however that you must be reasonable about the place your assist for his inventive profession turns into detrimental to your son and his prospects of being financially solvent over the long run. Does he have every other sources of earnings, whilst a plan B?

You and your spouse have a financially safe retirement. Fidelity Investments has just a few guidelines of thumb: By 40, you must have thrice your annual wage saved for retirement; by 50, you must have six instances; by 60, you must have eight instances; and by 67, you must have 10 instances. Few individuals obtain that. Assuming you’re in your 60s, you’re doing higher than most.

But what about your son? Has he began to avoid wasting for retirement? Are you his emergency fund? Is he counting on you for a down cost on a house? Most Americans suppose they’ll want to avoid wasting $1.27 million for retirement, but they report having lower than $90,000 on common in retirement financial savings, in keeping with a report by Northwestern Mutual, a financial-services firm.

You’re not going to expire of cash by giving your son $12,000 per 12 months in credit-card spending. But take into consideration how one can help him in different methods, too, together with by serving to him discover a long-term path that can permit him to realize what you have got accomplished throughout your lifetime — a path that enables him to reside independently and plan for his personal retirement. 

Readers write to me with all types of dilemmas. 

By emailing your questions, you comply with have them revealed anonymously on MarketWatch. By submitting your story to Dow Jones & Co., the writer of MarketWatch, you perceive and agree that we might use your story, or variations of it, in all media and platforms, together with by way of third events.

The Moneyist regrets he can not reply to questions individually.

More from Quentin Fottrell:

Do kids get 529 accounts in a divorce? My in-laws opened two plans for our children, however their marriage is on the rocks. 

I’m solely fascinated with zero threat’: I’m inheriting $100,000. Is a 5.5% CD an excellent fee? Where else ought to I make investments?

My sister squandered our dad and mom’ hundreds of thousands, requested me to offer her $10,000, then made me a tempting supply. Should I take it?